The Gospel According to Starbucks – Living with a Grande Passion, Leonard Sweet (This book has not been authorized by Starbucks Coffee Company
Brewed for Thought – The Gospel According to Starbucks – introduces the life you’d gladly stand in line for……you don’t stand in line at Starbucks just to buy a cup of coffee. You stop for the experience surrounding the cup of coffee…..
Too many of us line up for God out of duty or guilt. We completely miss the warmth and richness of the experience of living with God. If we’d learn to see what God is doing on earth, we could participate fully in the irresistible life that he offers.
You can learn to pay attention like never before, to identify where God is already in business right in your neighborhood. The doors are open and the coffee is brewing. God is serving the refreshing antidote to the unsatisfying, arms length spiritual life – and he won’t even make you stand in line.
Leonard Sweet shows you how the passion that Starbucks has for creating an irresistible experience can connect you with God’s stirring introduction to the experience of faith
Questions for Conversation with yourself and others by Edward Hammett –
The Brew of the Soul – Questions to stir the BREW, an acronym that stands for Being Real Engages the World. As you pursue a life of grande passion and EPIC faith, reflect on the personal meaning behind each word (Being Real Engages the World).
Being – Think about what it means fully into the person God made you to be:
1) Who do you want to be now?
2) What is creating who you are?
3) What distracts you from being all you can be?
4) What will move you from where you are to where God wants you to be?
Real – In being who God made you be, think about what it means to be real
5) How much of who you are now is who you want to be?
6) What is going on in you and through you that you are not proud of?
7) What would have to change in order for you to be more real?
8) What would make your life more pleasing to God?
9) What is the best version of yourself? How often do you see it?
Engages The – Think about the effect your life has
10) What places in your daily life intersect with your life mission
11) Who are the people in your path who fuel your life mission? Who are the ones who drain your life mission?
12) What do you want to do to achieve your life mission that you are not currently doing? What or who could help you do that right now?
World – Think about your life mission in terms of the people in your sphere of influence and the world that surrounds you.
13) How are you currently impacting the world you work in?
14) What impact are you having on your family? On your community?
15) Who specifically in your world needs encouragement, love, or hope
16) Where does your greatest passion intersect with the world’s greatest needs?
Dr. Toni
Midlife Crisis and Midlife Transition are not the same
Articles and blog posts about midlife crisis and midlife crisis symptoms flood the Internet landscape. Studies show that fewer than 10% of the people in the United States had experienced psychological crises due to their age or aging, documented in a 1999 large scale research study. Male and female crises are not common, despite the media hype surrounding the use of these terms.
I prefer to use the term midlife transition, which is empowering, whereas the term midlife crisis is dis-empowering. I know the subject of transition well because I have experienced it many times, as most mid lifers have. It is, however, important to realize that both a crisis and a transition include change.
Crisis, change, and transition
Crisis is an unstable situation of extreme danger or difficulty (online dictionary).
Change refers to an event which occurs when something in our life ends or is replaced by another event or way of doing something. Change is external; situational, like job loss or a divorce. It’s episodic and happens to you.
Transition is a gradual psychological re-orientation we experience as we try to adapt to change. It’s internal; it happens inside us.
A Different View
Dr. Fred Horowitz, a specialist in midlife development, asserts that midlife crisis is a “cultural story that is made up.”
William Bridges, an expert in transitions, says that the more accurate term to use when describing the process that ALL mid lifers go through is transition, not crisis.
His research shows that there are three phases to transition:
1. Ending, losing, letting go – you let go of old patterns and ways of being. This is a phase where you deal with loss.
2. The Neutral Zone – the old is gone and the new way isn’t fully integrated. It’s like the “gap” that a trapeze artist experiences when they let go of one trapeze and haven’t yet grasped the next one.
3. The New Beginning – you come out of the in-between time or the “gap” I refer to above. You are in a place where you can recreate yourself and create a new future for yourself.
Being in the Gap
It is well known that the Chinese character for crisis also represents opportunity. That is how the many transitions in my life have occurred to me. A case in point was my divorce. Although it was a major transition in my life, I never viewed it as a crisis.
I went through other “major” transitions in life. For example, I felt in the “gap,” referred to above, after I completed my doctorate in 1995 at 48 years of age. I experienced a certain fear and anxiety about what to do next. I was now faced with a “blank canvas.” What the heck was I going to do now?
How to Deal with Midlife Transitions
1. Allow yourself to “be” – to be in the space of not knowing, yet trusting that things will unfold and will turnout. Things always workout, no matter what drama we add to our lives.
2. Complete unfinished business of the past – take care of things left undone or unsaid; let go of resentments, regrets and remorse.
3. Practice the art of “being” – exercise, being in nature, meditation, breathing, yoga offer simple, yet practical ways of being. Find something that works for you.
4. Seek help from a professional like a coach, counselor, therapist.
5. Join a support group.
Dr. Frank Bonkowski writes about midlife career change, goal setting, education, self-discovery, and spirituality to leverage your midlife transition into lifelong happiness at Happiness-After-Midlife.com. Look for his forthcoming e book, entitled Take Charge of Midlife and Beyond: 52 Ideas and Activities for Dealing with Life’s Challenges – Aging, Change, Financial Matters, and More!
Article Source:
Aging Parents
In the past three weeks I’ve had numerous conversations with people who are taking care of aging parents. Just this morning I spoke with a friend who’s been in and out of assisted living facilities, doctor’s offices, and hospitals more 
times than he can count. Having been a fulltime caregiver for more than three years when my husband Michael was sick, I know how complicated and overwhelming it can be. And my heart goes out to you if you’re dealing with this situation now.
Becoming a caregiver to a parent is something most of us will experience at some point, and learning how to do it with good self-care in place, can help keep the love alive. While I know each situation is unique, here are a few suggestions that might help:
1. Get ongoing emotional support. As you go through the process of providing care to a parent, you will need a safe place to talk about how you feel. You will need to vent. You will need to grieve. You will need to know that someone out there cares about you and wants to know what’s going on. This person should know how to listen well, how to hold back advice when it’s not appropriate to give it, and how to be present with uncomfortable feelings so you’re free to be real and honest.
2. Find a “resource advocate.” It can be incredibly helpful to have someone in your life who’s able to conduct research. You may have to locate specialized medical care, get help with insurance forms, check into living facilities, or find a good doctor. Delegating these activities can help ease your burden and it can be a wonderful way to allow someone who cares about you to help when he or she feels helpless. While taking care of Michael and managing our lives, I swear I lost brain cells, my memory, and a whole lot of patience. Sharing the burden of information gathering made life so much easier.
3. Don’t take bad behavior personally. If your parent is difficult, negative, or irritable, it’s probably because they’re afraid. After all, they’re going through their own challenging life changes. Keep in mind that we all tend to regress into protective behaviors when under stress. Some people go into denial and lose themselves in mindless activities. Others get irritable and end up being impatient or brusque in their communication. Some complain nonstop about every little thing. Try to remember that it’s not about you. It’s about the tough situation.
4. Allow yourself to experience all of your feelings – even the “inappropriate” ones. There will be times when you experience thoughts and feelings that make you feel guilty. You might be so emotionally overwhelmed by the roller coaster ride that comes with the end of life process, for example, that you find yourself wishing your loved one would pass so the craziness will stop. Please remember that your feelings are just feelings – normal responses to dealing with new and complicated circumstances. If you respect and honor these thoughts and feelings (and share them with someone safe), you’ll move through them with greater ease and clarity. And you’ll be a better caregiver for your parent.
5. Be willing to have “courageous conversations.” Most of us don’t talk about death or end of life issues; let alone say what we need to say to feel at peace with one another. It’s too scary, painful, or uncomfortable to step near those lines. And it’s not always well received. The funny thing is that bringing consciousness – intentional, open conversation – to the topic can reduce fear and open our hearts. When we shine a light into the darkness, things get a little brighter. Be brave enough to initiate a conversation about end of life issues and see what happens. Tread gently and respectfully. You might be surprised to learn that your parent has been thinking about things like estate planning or what will happen to special items once they’re gone, and your courage has now opened the door for further conversation.
By Cheryl Richardson
The Midlife Transition: How do I find More JOY In My Life?
I have recently come across an author whom I am enjoying. She doesn’t talk directly about the Midlife Transition, but so much of what she says is relevant.
by Aine Belton
1. Keep a JOY-DIARY or scheduler that includes daily/weekly joy-doses and joy-treats! (Or add these from your joy-list into an existing diary!).
Write a JOY-LIST of all that brings you joy, and be sure to regularly schedule things from this list into your day/week/year! 🙂
2. Take trip somewhere this week that makes your heart sing!
It could be somewhere in nature, perhaps a garden or park, perhaps a weekend break in a new city, a day visit to the ocean, an art gallery or museum, a country drive, a music concert or karaoke night, an amusement park, a fine restaurant, a gym, spa, or helicopter lesson!
Set the date, make the booking and do it!
3. Throw a fun dinner or themed party. Create some fun rules and be creative. Research some fun games that can be played. Get creative!
Perhaps inform people that… Everyone has to wear_______________ Everyone has to share_______________ Everyone has to bring_______________ Everyone has to create _______________
Perhaps everyone bring a cheap gift to share with another by random picking, or bring a home-made cake, present, poem, etc.
4. Do something you’ve never done before! Aim for something you think you’ll enjoy of course! Perhaps it’s something you’ve always been curious about – a type of exercise, a creative hobby, a type of food, a new meditation technique, singing classes, a roller-blade disco, paint-balling, etc. Doing new things and surprising yourself (and others!) can be a great way to bring more joy into your life.
5. Change your work environment setting in some way if you can. If you work from a computer, find out if there’s a lovely café or restaurant with WiFi you can travel to and enjoy a cup of tea and cake while you’re working for a change of scenery.
If you can’t change WHERE you work, what can you do differently or change in your work routine or environment to brighten things up? Some flowers perhaps? A lush lunch break somewhere new? Ordering in some cake, treats or pizza in to your office? Or what about adding a picture, photo, vision board, crystal, sacred, meaningful or uplifting object, or affirmation card somewhere on your desk or in your work environment to uplift the energy?
6. Walk in nature. An outdoors trek, even just a short walk, can lift your spirits and fill your heart with the wondrous beauty and joy of nature. Today I went for a brief 15 minute walk along the river-side, and what a delight it was! I was glowing with joy after 🙂
You can search online for nearby parks to stroll in, or walking trails and hike paths in the countryside. There are also companies that arrange walks and hikes, where you can just turn up, and a small group of others wanting to walk just like you are driven to a location for a guided walk of the area, be it in nature or the city.
7. Exercise. Moving your body with exercise of any kind, clear out the cobwebs, gets your energy flowing and endorphins pumping and elevates your state. There are SO many ways to exercise. Try a few to find those that you love!
You could join a gym, explore martial arts, Yoga, Pilates or Qigong, trapeze, jogging, salsa classes, tennis, climbing, dance, roller-blading, hoola hooping, skipping, swimming, and so on.
8. Listen to the ‘whispers’ and ‘nudges’ in your outer reality; meanings and metaphors present in your world. This is fully covered in the Decoding Reality section of the Intuition Zone with lots of examples.(I will add that this is especially relevant for those in the midlife transition)
When you awaken to the illusory nature of reality – life becomes very magical and fun indeed!
You are loved, guided and supported every step of your journey, whether you realize it or not.
Your outer world is essentially a holographic illusion and can serve as a platform of communication. It speaks of and reflects your current state of consciousness, your beliefs, thoughts and feelings, phases and ‘themes’ you may be going through, learnings and challenges, gifts and patterns, and so on.
Your outer reality can also be a means through which your Higher Self, guides, and the Universe, communicate with you to offer insight and support.
Opening to this guidance and communication can be great fun!
Notice the book someone is reading opposite you on the train, or the leaflet that blows into your path on the street. What are the metaphoric messages these hold – the headings and phrases, email subject lines, perhaps, the conversations you over-hear, etc.? Particularly note any that are repeated or very similar in message and meaning.
Nothing is ‘by accident’ as such. I’m not suggesting here to over-analyze or scrutinize every occurrence, just be open to possible significances and synchronicities.
The universe is whispering. Can you hear it? Life becomes joyous when you develop this co-creative relationship with spirit and open to magical living!
May your Midlife Transition be the opening to the best possible time of your life.
