Law of Attraction

When Mother Teresa received her Nobel Prize, she was asked, what can we do to promote world Peace?  She replied, Go home and Love your Family! My topic today is on Choosing Fear or Love  based on the work “Love is Letting Go of Fear” – Gerald Jampolsky

Did you grow up in a home  where you were constantly told to be SEEN AND NOT HEARD? Or – in one of the following TYPES OF FAMILIES –

1. LOOK GOOD   where you had to hide problems from community ; usually the family enjoys some status… It’s not okay to display feelings that don’t support the family self-image. It is a constant state of Denial. Everything is always FINE – the Feelings inside are Not expressed…

In this kind of family, YOU HAVE TO BE PERFECT TO PLEASE GOD – and you knew you couldn’t be that!

RD Laing… Bradshaw’s Creating Love
When I was fourteen my class had to write a home essay on ourselves.  Mine began,  “Time lies heavily on my hands.”  My parents were upset by this because they said it reflected on them… “You always have plenty to do…and it shows how ungrateful you are for all we have done for you.’   So I changed the opening to “I find life full of interest.”  They were very happy, and I got a “Very Good.”

Children learn to live a lie..

2. Church Going  — tend to spiritualize everything – WE don’t have arguments in our family – Bury their heads – there is nothing wrong here…  Once again – child grows up to be an adult in denial of feelings or worse yet with a SPIRITUAL ADDICTION – They develop a Relationship with a spiritual world since this one isn’t working!  (This isn’t ALWAYS the case with Church goers…but it is an extreme I am well aware of!

 3. Soap Opera—roller coaster – shifting relationships and high emotions  — often alcoholic homes – or homes where parents had bouts of anger followed by what looked like a lot of warmth. Sometimes these people RUN TO GOD in times of NEED ONLY

 4. Not There – everyone had his or her own life  — totally disorganized or looking like a hospital room – but certainly not relaxed.  Each member lived separate lives, preoccupied with goals that weren’t shared.  Lots of turfs and rights. ABSENT GOD  – GOD IS DEAD

 Encouraging a child means that one or more of the following critical life messages are coming through, either by word or by action:  I believe in you, I trust you,  I know you can handle this. You are listened to, you are cared for, you are very important to me.

Often in homes we grew up in, parents just weren’t there for us – sometimes physically – often emotionally.

5. Only Adults Live Here. – special rooms children can’t enter or conversations in a different language that children don’t understand.

God BECOMES SOMEONE SO DISTANT  — certainly not someone we can reach.

 6. Crime and Punishment – where physical and emotional boundaries are frequently violated and force and threat were often used.   GOD WILL PUNISH YOU…

The relationship you have with yourself is highly influenced by the relationships you had with the adults around you as a child. The way the adults reacted to us then is often the way we react to ourselves now, both positively and negatively.  When we grow up, we have a tendency to recreate the emotional environment of our early home life.

This is not good or bad, right or wrong.  It is just what we know inside us “home’.  We also tend to recreate in our personal relationships, the relationships we had with our mothers or with our fathers, or what they had between them. We also treat ourselves the way our parents treated us. We scold and punish ourselves in the same way.

Think for a moment of the words you use when you are scolding yourself?  Most of the times you’ll find that they are the same words YOUR PARENTS used when they were scolding you??  YOU NEVER DO ANYTHING RIGHT…. It’s ALL YOUR FAULT. How often have you said these things about yourself.

What about the words you use to Praise yourself… It’s usually the ones that were used on you as well..  YOU ARE WONDERFUL.. I LOVE YOU…  How often do you tell yourself these things!!

Perhaps your parents never praised you, so you have no idea of how to praise yourself and hopefully by now you know there is something to praise. ***********I AM NOT BLAMING PARENTS  — they couldn’t possibly teach us what they didn’t know. This message is just about giving us access to hidden beliefs or patterns we may not already be aware of.

Sondra Ray, the great Rebirther who has done so much work with relationships claims that every major relationship we have is a reflection of the relationship we had with one of our parents.

She claims that until we clean up that first one, we will never be free to create exactly what we want in the rest of our relationships.

Have you thanked your parents lately?

The essence of the Quality of Love that we all posses is something deeper; it comes from the Aramaic word, Karma . a universal love that declares, .I love you because it is my nature to love.. You do not have to change for me to practice unconditional love and goodwill in both thought and action. Love – THE FEELING – is a fruit of love, the verb. The fruit of the action we take  because of our very nature is what creates love; it’s the decision to love, not waiting for it to  happen to you. That’s
what most of us do, we wait for love to come, rather than know that love is who we already are.

So, unconditional type of love, when it sees something unlike itself, looks past it. It can go beyond because this Love seeks the highest good. This is the kind of love  that seeks the best out of each person. Universal love doesn’t look at whether or not someone is worthy to be loved. We make all those judgments? Should I love this person or not? Do I think that they measure up? Are they really up to my standards here? What is that about? The innate quality of love says, .I don’t care what you do. I don’t
care who you are. I will love you. I will seek  the best for you. I will seek the good things for you. I will seek to do the good things for your  life. I will lift you up that will bless your life. I will make you a better person than you are. I want to make you better than you are.

Isn’t that what life does? Doesn’t life constantly call us to be more than we already are? No matter what’s happening in our life. What it is, is a constant call that says, I want more for you. I want to give you all I have. I want you to have the good. This is a love that seeks your good of another person and doesn’t count whether they deserve it. There’s nothing you can do to deserve love. Isn’t that good news? How many of us strive continually in order to deserve love? We think we have to do something; we
have to be something in order to be loved.

There’s a really beautiful illustration of this kind of love. When a woman in a certain African tribe knows she is pregnant, she goes out into the wilderness with a few friends and together they pray and meditate until they hear the song of the unborn child. They recognize that every soul that comes into this world has its own vibration that expresses its unique flavor and purpose. When the women attune to the song, they sing it out loud. Then they return to the tribe and teach it to everyone else.

When the child is born, the community gathers and sings the child’s song to him or her. Later, when the child enters education, the village gathers and chants the child’s song. When the child passes through the initiation to adulthood, the people again come together and sing. At the time of marriage, the person hears his or her song. Finally, when the soul is about to pass from this world, the family and friends gather at the person’s bed, just as they did at their birth, and they sing the person to the next
life.

In the African tribe there is one other occasion upon which the villagers sing to the child. If at any time during his or her life, the person commits a crime or an aberrant social act, the individual is called to the center of the village and the people in the community form a circle around them. Then they sing their song to them. The tribe recognizes that the correction for antisocial behavior is not punishment; it is love and the remembrance of identity.

The Law of Attraction comes into play – when you recognize your own song, you have no desire or need to do anything that would hurt another. That’s tapping into the quality of love that we are.

You may not have grown up in a tribe that sings your song to you at crucial life transitions, but life itself is always reminding you when you are in tune with yourself and when you are not. When you feel good, you are in vibrational harmony and the Law of Attraction says – what you are doing matches your song. When you feel awful, it doesn’t. It’s natural.

We’re told that angels have wings because they take themselves lightly. Notice this week when you are making a drama out of something, and see what story you are telling yourself. “What am I telling myself about what’s happening? What’s really happening and what’s my story about what’s happening?” See if you can see that in two ways: one – see the facts of what is happening. I once heard this described as what you can put in a wheelbarrow. So, if you are saying something like, “When he did this, it made me”
or, “She said this, and it must have meant.” stop and say, “Would someone who was observing what was happening be able to say that’s what’s happened?” What would a newspaper picture show was actually happening? If someone frowns, for example, we say, “Obviously they are angry or obviously…” What would the picture look like if it were a static picture? We don’t only see what is happening, we make up what it means. And that’s when we lose our joy! What we make up makes us lose our joy! Trust me – I know, I’m good
at it!

Train yourself to be a Joy Detective. Look for the joy, instead of looking for what’s wrong. How many of us look for what’s wrong with the picture? And there may be a situation or it may be something in you. When you are tempted to complain about something, try complimenting yourself instead! Complain. Stop. Switch to a compliment.

And if there are experiences that you don’t feel joyful about ask, “What’s good about this situation?” When you ask the brain a question like, “What’s wrong with me?” your brain will give you an entire list of what’s wrong, or why this isn’t working. Your brain will tell you it’s because your mother did this when you were three and this happened when you were seven.  Doesn’t that happen? So the questions we ask ourselves are really important. The question we are asking is, “What’s good about this situation?”
Get back to the original joy. Then, find at least 10 things a day you can compliment – and say them out loud to someone else. It’s a great way to experience joy. You can’t help but be joyful if you are spending the day thinking of what to compliment. Think about that, and begin to look at what’s working in your life and in everyone else’s.

And if there are experiences that you don’t feel joyful about ask, “What’s good about this situation?” When you ask the brain a question like, “What’s wrong with me?” your brain will give you an entire list of what’s wrong, or why this isn’t working. Your brain will tell you it’s because your mother did this when you were three and this happened when you were seven.  Doesn’t that happen? So the questions we ask ourselves are really important. The question we are asking is, “What’s good about this situation?”
Get back to the original joy. Then, find at least 10 things a day you can compliment – and say them out loud to someone else. It’s a great way to experience joy. You can’t help but be joyful if you are spending the day thinking of what to compliment. Think about that, and begin to look at what’s working in your life and in everyone else’s.

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