I just read a wonderful post by Joe Vitale on his blog…
ENJOY…
http://blog.mrfire.com/loa/how-to-attract-anything/
Law of Attraction
Anger – the Hidden ‘Gotcha’ of Midlife
by hlesbrown
For the uninitiated, the midlife crisis seems inexplicable. Why would someone who should be really happy behave so erratically? There’s the key, though: they should be really happy . . . but they’re not! Even those closest to the midlife sufferer are apt to be shocked and confused because there’s no discernible reason they can find to explain their friend or loved one’s erratic behavior. In addition, when they sit down to talk with the poor unfortunate, they don’t ever seem to get a straight answer. What they may not realize is that even the person him- or herself isn’t able to sort out what’s going on.
One of the core features of the midlife crisis consists of the inability to connect feelings with facts. And, the feelings that accompany the midlife transition can be very intense (as well as very negative). Getting up first thing in the morning and, before you know it, feeling like doo-doo inside only aggravates the situation. Sadly, the negative, free-floating emotions soon generate a low-grade, equally free-floating anger. Generally, when you experience such unattached emotions, your reaction tends to send you into self-doubt; self-doubt sends you into denial; denial spawns displaced anger (a bad day at work translates into anger at your spouse).
The midlife transition strikes at the core of your self-esteem. It casts all of your basic assumptions into question. It undermines whatever platform of stability that you’ve constructed for yourself. It dissociates your choices and decisions from expected rewards or punishments, pleasure or pain. You suddenly discover that, on one hand, no good deed goes unpunished, and, on the other hand, breaking the rules often has no consequences or even brings about some good results. At the same time, you come to the realization that all your planning and hard work has brought you to this point in your life, but, either you’re not quite sure where ‘this point’ really is in the big scheme of things, or where you are isn’t what you thought it’d be. Either way, you’re confused, disappointed and, above all, angry.
Nobody has ever told you that arriving at this juncture was a normal part of your evolution as a mature person. It feels as though the situation is out of control, you’ve no one to blame but yourself, and you have no idea how you got into this mess, let alone how to get out of it. Sure, you can find any number of people to blame (and you will), but all of your complaining and finger-pointing sounds strangely hollow and unconvincing. Deep down, you’re starting to feel that you know who’s responsible for this mess you’re in and you’re it! That’s not something our psyche (particularly as males) wants to deal with. So we’re left with free-floating anxiety generating free-floating anger that’s tending to explode randomly in all directions but achieving nothing (except making you feel even worse). On top of this all, you feel like you’re the only person in the world having to deal with this. It’s like puberty all over again, only worse, because you haven’t any explosive hormones to blame it on and nobody to offer excuses for you.
Depression, they say, is anger turned inward. No wonder you’re feeling depressed! At the same time, unrelieved anger is an emotion-blocker. As long as you’re stuck in the mire of free-floating anger, other emotions like true joy or sorrow simply can’t express themselves. Anger turns you into an emotional Johnny One-Note. You find yourself stuck like a prehistoric animal in the La Brea Tar Pits. That’s what a midlife crisis feels like. Yet, escape is surprisingly easy: once you’re aware of what’s really going on, and once you’ve come to accept that this experience is not only normal but a positive sign of growth, you can let the anger go. And, once the anger’s gone, you’re free: the crisis is over. Does it sound easy? In theory it is; in practice it takes some real work for you to get to true Midlife Mastery.
Women in Midlife: Learning to FLOW with the Universe
The flow of the universe moves through everything. It is in the rocks that form, get pounded into dust, and are blown away. It is in the blossoming of a flower born from a seed planted in the spring. The growth cycle that every human being goes through is part of this natural flow, which is also the current that takes us down life’s paths. When we move with it rather than resisting it, we are riding on the universal wave that allows us to flow with life.
Many people live struggling against this current. They try to use force or resistance to will their lives into happening in the way they think it should. Others move with it like a sailor using the wind, trusting that the universe is taking them exactly where they need to be at all times. This flow is accessible to everyone because it travels through and around us. We are always riding it—it is just a matter of whether we are willing to go with it or we resist it. Choosing to go with the flow is often a matter of relinquishing the notion that we need to be in control at all times.
The flow is always transporting you where you need to go. It is merely a question of deciding whether you plan on accepting the ride or having it take you there with your feet dragging. Learning to step into it can help you feel a connection to a force that is greater than you and is always there to support you. The decision to go with the flow takes courage because you are surrendering the belief that you need to do everything by yourself. Riding the flow of the universe can be effortless, exhilarating, and unlike anything you ever expected. When you are receptive to being in it, you open yourself to possibilities that exist beyond the grasp of your control.
As a child, you were naturally swept by the flow. Tears of sadness falling down your face could just as quickly turn to tears of laughter. The mere tiniest wave carrying you forward off the shores of the ocean could transport you into peals of delight.
Our souls feel good when we go with the flow of the universe. All we have to do is make the choice to ride its currents.
(This is an excerpt from the new DailyOM Book. )
Are You Visioning Or Visualizing? The Difference Will Lead You To A Fuller Life
Have you learned how to relax more in midlife and start moving from MAKING things happen to allowing them to happen? This is a critical step in moving through midlife.
Most of us live our lives moving back and forth between being victim and believing that life is happening to us and being manifestors or co-creators and knowing that we are responsible for what is coming into our lives. (stages 1 and 2 of spiritual growth are known as TO ME and BY ME)
The third stage of spiritual growth, known as THROUGH ME, is all about allowing things to happen rather than making them or forcing them.
All my life I’ve known that I could have or do anything that I put my mind down to. Clear focus, persistence and action do produce results. When we set goals, focus on them and take daily action, we do see them happen. This is often done with lots of effort and strain. But, there is truly an easier way.
I remember once hearing Dr. Michael Beckwith, Director of the Agape Center in CA (of ‘The Secret” fame) say, “This is the stage where we stop making things happen and begin to make them welcome.”
While visualization – the practice of deciding what you want and focusing on it happening is a major tool for stage two development, the process of Visioning is a stage three tool where you sit in silence asking of your higher self, the Universe, or God as you see it, “What is Your highest idea for me in this area…”
In other articles, I’ll be sharing more about this as I speak more about processes we can use when reinventing ourselves.
Are you ready to give up Control?
Once you get good at manifestation but want to move onto a higher state, you need to give up Control. That’s a tough one, right – particularly if you’re a control freak – at times – Its’ difficult; particularly if you’ve been buffered around by life and someone tells you, You can have it all. “It’s the Father’s good pleasure to give you the Kingdom”, you can manifest life the way you want it to be, you can experience the kingdom, if you can see it you can have it.
Truly life-changing results
Once you start truly manifesting, you begin to change your life. Your body begins to heal; your body of affairs begin to take on the shape of beauty and harmony and wholeness and prosperity, etc. There’s no way you want to give up control! That only happens as a result of your awareness that the will of God is Good – it is not chaotic – it is a greater order than we can make for ourselves.
So, every time we pray; every time we meditate, every time we speak the word; every time we do a spiritual mind treatment, we’re coming into a greater awareness that the Spirit of God is for us not against us- that the will of God and my heart’s desire is the same thing – there is no difference between my inner heart’s desire and the will of God – They’re the same – that the Spirit of God recreated me in its own image and likeness to reveal all that God is in a most magnificent and beautiful way – and as I know that – I become more willing to release – I’m willing to let go of control so that spontaneously goodness can begin to flow through me – without my making it happen – I become aware that something has happened and I participate in that..
In the ZONE
Now, all of you have had that experience – perhaps in your writing, in art, in athletics, there came a moment when suddenly you were in the Zone and beyond what you could image or make happen, you went beyond your borders and your boundary and experiences something and revealed some piece of music or some piece of art that was beyond what you really could make happen and sometimes you even feel somehow that you didn’t do it – it was done through you.
Those are moment of the Spirit operating through you, when you weren’t trying to make it happen but you were totally involved in it. Do you understand what I’m saying?
Learning to Rest
Okay so, when we become willing to let go of control and to rest in the Spirit with the awareness that the Will of God and our heart’s desire is the same thing, then this happens more and more and more. We become more and more in present moment, more and more in now moment, and more and more of the spontaneous goodness takes place beyond our ability to plan for it, beyond our ability to control it. We’ve done so much work at this level that we can let go. What a glorious place to be! And so, do everything you can to help yourself stay in that state and create a midlife worth having.
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And so, I would like to offer a support system for getting and keeping clear in your life. When you subscribe to my free Women Reinvent Midlife newsletter, you’ll even receive a special report called, “7 Secrets for Reinventing Midlife from the Inside-Out”. You can get your copy right now by filling in the form at the right. From Dr. Toni LaMotta, Midlife Reinvention Specialist and Spiritual Life Clarity Coach |
Women In Midlife – Opening To An Experience Of Oneness With All Of Life Changes Your Own Midlife
As we move through midlife, we go through many stages of spiritual growth. Often, we learn to move from being victim, to being fully responsible for manifesting in our lives. We then learn to surrender to something higher than ourselves, though fully part of ourselves.
The final stage of spiritual growth is one that not too many people talk about, because it is one of which we achieve only glimpses. This is the stage of spiritual growth that the ancient mystics called the Unitive way and that enlightened masters call a state of Oneness.
To move from level three to four, we have to come into a greater state of beingness. We have to give up our sense of separation.. a personal sense of a life apart from God.
You’ll notice that even when you pray, sometimes there still is this sense that there is your life and there is the Life of God somewhere else. For years, that still happens. But, with every insight, or spiritual revelation or realization, you have moments of becoming aware that the life of God that is in you, the life of God that surrounds you, the life of God that is everywhere IS your life and the personal sense of a life apart from God begins to diminish..
So the sense of separation – to move into that state of being – that sense of separation begins to dissolve. This level is so important because it is possible to have a sincere surrender, release and let Go to the presence of God while you retain a sense of duality.
I had the privilege of going to India last year to a place known as the Oneness University. I was there for 21 days and we were invited to stay in silence. Each day we were showered with an energy transfer then known as Deeksha (it’s now called the Oneness Blessing). The simplest thing I can say about that experience is that it took me out of my mind. I began to allow myself to experience things rather than analyze them. (that’s BIG for me!) – To this day, I find that practice easier than ever before. I discovered that living in a state of Oneness is a gift of grace.
I invite you to research the Oneness Movement and to check out this phenomena. Or, at the very least, start to notice where you live in separation – the me and the not me, the mine and yours syndrome. The first step is oneness with ourselves, then with one another, then with the animals, plants and life around us and finally with all that is, or God Itself.
When you find yourself getting restless and wondering what life is about, remember the words of St. Augustine (pulling this out of my past!) – “Our hearts are restless until we rest in thee.” We are made to experience this Oneness and when we do, nothing else matters. I have the privilege of sharing the Oneness Blessing each week and I notice that the more I allow myself to receive, the greater my experience of midlife becomes.
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And so, I would like to offer a support system for opening to grace and getting and keeping clear in your life. When you subscribe to my free Women Reinvent Midlife newsletter, you’ll even receive a special report called, “7 Secrets for Reinventing Midlife from the Inside-Out”. You can get your copy right now at http://www.reinventmidlife.com
From Dr. Toni LaMotta, Midlife Reinvention Specialist and Spiritual Life Clarity Coach |
