Complete work also benefits relationships -Learn to give WHOLE or complete messages. This means not leaving things out, not covering up your anger, not squelching your wants. It means giving accurate feedback about what you observe, clearly stating your inferences and conclusions, saying how it all makes you feel, and if you need something or see possibilities for change, making straight-forward requests or suggestions. One of the gifts of aging that I have found is the lessening of concern about what others think about me and the increase of concern of how I communicate with love and clarity at all times.
When you leave something out, it’s a partial message. And these cause confusion and mistrust. People sense something is missing but they don’t know what. They’re turned off when they hear judgments untempered by your feelings and hopes. They resist hearing anger that doesn’t include the story of your hurt or frustration. They are suspicious of conclusions without supporting observations. They are uncomfortable with demands growing from unexpressed feelings and assumptions.
Not every relationship or situation requires whole messages. Effective communication with your garage mechanic probably won’t involve a lot of deep feeling or discussion of your emotional needs. Even with intimates, the majority of messages are informational. But partial messages with important information left out or obscured are always dangerous. They become booby traps when used to express complex issues that are an inevitable part of closeness.
You can test whether you are giving complete messages by asking the following questions:
1. Have I expressed what I actually know to be a fact? Is it based on what I’ve observed, read or heard?
2. Have I expressed and clearly labeled my inferences and conclusions?
3. Have I expressed my feelings without blame or judgment.
4. Have I shared my needs without blame or Judgment?
FIFTH — Importance of doing affirmative prayer till something is complete
I am writing and doing affirmative prayer daily for my perfect life partner… I promise I won’t give up… What will you promise to pray for as well?
How many of us give up after just a short time or when obstacles appear in the way.
Be relentlessly complete in all areas of your life. Make room for the abundance of Good that is simply waiting for space.
The whole point of the affirmative type prayer is not to be interceding with a god out-there but to come to a place where we KNOW — our good is already available to us.. We simply need to provide the openness – the space to receive.
I suggest that, along with things like meditation and tithing, we consider completion as a spiritual practice-
Sometimes we think we have to be in Church to be spiritual – or around “spiritual People” whatever that means…
We are spiritual beings – everything we do is therefore spiritual.
So, let’s look at the spirituality of completion.
On a very practical level it means FINISHING anything that is incomplete.
Before you set out to do this, be sure you have a strong compassion for yourself and don’t use it as a means of putting yourself down. “GET” -that we always do our best, even when we KNOW we aren’t.
Come to see that staying incomplete with someone or something in your past gives you unhealthy energy – and takes energy from the things you want to be accomplishing.
