I’m reading Marianne Williamson’s latest book again and it’s helping to evoke some of my own ideas about midlife. Her life and mine have been very different and while we are on similar paths, we come to some different conclusions or at least different viewpoints.
It’s made me wonder about what YOUR viewpoints on midlife are or have been? I’m writing these days on Messages that Women, in particular, have received about midlife.
As an example, I like to watch makeover shows — -not the extreme ones — but, things like What Not to Wear and How Do I Look. While I usually like those shows and love the way they help women with their self-esteem, one thing I noticed is that everyone they work with is YOUNG…. say 20 -30 mostly. Many times, when one of them isn’t dressing well, they say to her — You look 60! EEKS — I find myself cringing at the thought that that’s how these fashion icons see 60 year olds. I’ve passed 60 and I pride myself on the way I dress. I want to be a mentor and a model for what is possible.
What about you? What message do you see out there about being a midlife woman (or older?) Please post your comments here…You’ll be helping yourself as well as those who are following us in a better world!
I also like to watch those makeover shows and I’m 57. I cringe at the thought of ever wearing sensible shoes, blue hair, etc. However, somethimes I’m not sure what age-appropriate clothing is anymore. I want to keep looking sharp but not like I’m trying to look too young. I’m still usually taken for 5-10 years younger, and I don’t mind that. I work out, try to eat healthy and read up on the latest health news, taking some of it with a grain of salt, knowing some of it will probably be debunked pretty soon anyway. I try and pay attention to what my body says is good for me. But that’s okay at any age!
I love hearing how healthy mid-life women are — not just physically – We HAVE learned to trust ourselves.
For the moment, I’m looking also for NEGATIVE MESSAGES that you may have picked up — I think I’ve overcome a lot of them as well — and yet, it’s the ones we don’t recognize that trip us up.
The first chapter of my new book is meant to expose these messages.
What have you heard/seen? What did your parents say? What did you believe would happen in mid-life?
Thanks for responding..
Dr. TOni
Hi Dr. Toni,
I too have heard mixed messages lately on this subject. Mostly I respond back to myself with my heart-how I feel inside. For instance, today at noon I decided to get some quick excercise so I jumped on my bike and took off for a ride to the beach for a walk in the sand in my bare feet. As I took off I thought “I know I’m almost 57 years old, but I still FEEL like a kid inside. I feel so young”. I like who I am and I like my own company. When I find things about me I don’t like, I work tirelessly to change them. I’m so grateful for my life and all my experiences. Today at 56, I have four grown children, and I’m a grandma four times. (Yeah!) I feel more comfortable in my own body even though it’s not picture perfect by Hollywood’s standards. I love my work and I’m learning new things everyday. I’m excited about my future as I am always making new plans and experiencing new adventures. Every day is a new day, a new chance to start again, a new day for a miracle. I love it.
Hi Dr. Toni,
I am turning the big 60 in a few weeks and I’m filled with wonderment. I wonder what is in store for me! Filled with mixed emotions. I’ve had a great life, great sons, daughters-in-law and beautiful and delightful grandchildren. I have worked hard on myself both spiritually and physically, however, I still feel like something is missing. I enjoy my own company and I know I bring joy and laughter to others lives. But I wonder what’s in store. I’m waiting for something great to happen. Not sure what is around the corner. Instead of feeling settled in my mid-life, I don’t. There is an uneasiness that makes me uncomfortable because I can’t figure it out. I am being still and going within, letting go and letting GOD… to see what will be revealed.
CM